Grandmama’s Song

She used to be a kid, before I knew her, and before I was my mother’s child
She played in fields of high weeds and old barns and hoped to finish the 6th grade
She was poor and orphaned but saw the world fondly
Past women’s emancipation, segregation and finally integration
She used to be a drinker, a smoker, a partier and nosey too
Before she got saved
When her body was shaped like a coke bottle men swarmed like bees to taste her sweetness
And I watched
She curled her hair with strips of brown paper sacks before putting on bold print dresses and painting her fingernails red to match her lips
She used to be my caregiver, my cook, and my comedian
She bought me penny candy and Pepsi every first of the month
And nobody in the world made hot water cornbread like her
My Grandmama
Until cancer diminished her youth and spirit and left me with memories that hurt long before they brought comfort
But she didn’t complain
As a matter of fact it was a long-long while before we even knew
Because to her it was more about us being okay
Now, as I leave her flowers and rub my fingers across cold stone
I picture her flying high across the sky
Hair long and black
Skin firm and smooth and joints agile
Hugging the clouds with arms of love and laughter